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Tuesday, November 19, 2019

Thoughts - 10 Years to Today

Thoughts - 10 Years to Today

I won't be sharing a picture of myself from 10 years ago.



Because basically, none exist. I don't take pictures of myself. I was and am still reminded in each image about my skin colour. The skin colour that I have let others use to oppress me for much of my life.

Through much of my adult years. There are remarkably few pictures. No one is interested in taking pictures of me. I was not interested in taking pictures of me. I associate my body, my shape, my fitness, and my race negatively in portraiture.

I don't know what has caused this. But it hurts.

And I don't know how to fix it. I don't know if I deserve to fix it.

Anyway. No, I won't post a picture from ten years ago, none exist. And no I won't post a picture of today.

Almost every picture I have of myself actually was taken by a professional photographer during an event or a show, and as ancillary during a performance. Almost always, because "The lighting looked interesting."

So. Sure.

I am as ever, a strange and supportive prop in other people's lives.

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